Five Steps To Leave Anxiety Behind!

 For some people anxiety can be debilitating and they may feel out of control. However, if you face whatever is causing you anxiety and think about it in a different way then you can take the control back. CBT and Counselling Kent’s help for anxiety Ashford can help you leave anxiety behind once and for all.

Most anxiety attacks are the result of your brain’s amygdala going in to fight-flight mode in response to an irrational thought.

So in order to overcome anxiety for the long term it’s important to do things differently next time your heart starts racing or you start to panic.

Counselling for anxiety Ashford will help you try the following steps: - 

1. Get in tune with the physical symptoms experience you when you become anxious. Common physiological responses might include a rapid heartbeat, tightening of the chest, difficulty breathing, dizziness and nausea. If you notice how your body is getting worked up your mind is less likely to run with it.  

2. Practice deep-breathing to stop anxiety in its tracks. The goal is to recognise that your mind and body are over-reacting – you are not actually in any danger it is just your mind catastrophising. Being present is crucial for getting out of panic mode and back in to your rational mind. 

3. Be aware of catastrophising!  Watch out for dramatic, negative, unrealistic and unhealthy “what if” thoughts. Anxiety feeds on catastrophic thinking and over-attention “What if they think I’m boring, that would be terrible!” and worst-case scenarios: “Oh my god, what if my headache is actually a brain tumour?”

4. Replace any irrational, rigid thoughts with more rational adaptive thought processes - change the way you respond. “Here we go again, my anxiety wants to get the better of me. I’m sweating and my breathing is shallow, but I’m okay. I’m going to pull over to the side of the road and calm down. Being a few minutes late to work is not the end of the world.” Making it to this step means you’re thinking with your rational brain.

5. Behave differently. Because anxiety is rooted in the automatic fight-flight response, the brain can’t distinguish between a real threat and a perceived threat. It’s common to go into auto-pilot and either react impulsively (fight), or escape due to emotional flooding (flight). Sometimes the perceived threat is so intense, you may become immobile (freeze). Once you identify your patterns of unhealthy behaviour, you can make informed decisions about what to do instead: “Rather than turn down an invitation to a night out and avoid it, I’m going to think through ‘what am I really worried about’ and despite maybe feeling a little uncomfortable before I, go anyway”

If you would like some help with your anxiety contact counselling for anxiety Ashford kent to make an appointment.

Don’t let Anxiety Define You!

Anxiety is a normal, although perhaps, an unpleasant human emotion, which can affect us all in different ways and at different times. Whereas stress is something that will come and go as the external factor causing it (such as work, relationship or money problems, etc.) comes and goes, anxiety is something that can persist whether or not the cause is clear to the sufferer. Here at CBT and Counselling Kent our CBT therapists or counsellor will give you help for Anxiety Ashford by guiding you to understand how it’s your unhelpful thought patterns and behaviour that is driving your anxiety.

Anxiety is the body's way of responding to being in danger. Adrenaline is rushed into our bloodstream to enable us to run away or fight. This happens whether the danger is real, or whether we believe the danger is there when actually there is none. It is the body's alarm and survival mechanism. Primitive man wouldn't have survived for long without this life-saving response. It works so well, that it often kicks in when it's not needed - when the danger is in our heads rather than in reality. We think we're in danger, so that's enough to trigger the system to go, go, go! People who get anxious tend to get into scanning mode - where they're constantly on the lookout for danger, hyper-alert to any of the signals, and make it more likely that the alarm system will be activated.

Common physiological responses might include a rapid heartbeat, tightening of the chest, difficulty breathing, dizziness and nausea. 

Be aware of catastrophising!  Watch out for dramatic, negative, unrealistic and unhealthy “what if” thoughts. Anxiety feeds on catastrophic thinking and over-attention “What if they think I’m boring, that would be terrible!” and worst-case scenarios: “Oh my god, what if my headache is actually a brain tumour?” CBT and Counselling Kent offers help for anxiety helping you make sense of those irrational thoughts.

We will help you replace any irrational, rigid thoughts with more rational adaptive thought processes - change the way you respond. “Here we go again, my anxiety wants to get the better of me. I’m sweating and my breathing is shallow, but I’m okay. I’m going to pull over to the side of the road and calm down. Being a few minutes late to work is not the end of the world.” Making it to this step means you’re thinking with your rational brain.

 Because anxiety is rooted in the automatic fight-flight response, the brain can’t distinguish between a real threat and a perceived threat. It’s common to go into auto-pilot and either react impulsively (fight), or escape due to emotional flooding (flight). Sometimes the perceived threat is so intense; you may become immobile (freeze).  

Repeat steps 1-5 as often as necessary. Sometimes this process with take a few minutes, other times you're in it for the long haul. 

The help for anxiety we offer at CBT and Counselling Kent works with you to identify your patterns of unhealthy behaviour so you can make informed decisions about what to do instead

Angry people are not always wise!

Most of us don’t like confrontation and will avoid it where possible. However, there are times we have to assert ourselves, our boundaries and our needs and others will want to do the same with us. Some people do this by becoming angry, shouting, throwing things and sometime with physical violence – that’s where Private Counselling Ashford Kent can help.

There are a number of ways in which we can express unhappiness/displeasure about something but when we it comes out as anger, it’s guaranteed that it will almost, always be unproductive and ineffective. The unhealthy negative emotion of anger is also exhausting. We might think we feel good during a 60 second rant at another person, but one things for sure, once we have calmed down, we always end up feeling bad about ourselves.

Anger - both direct or passive- is meant to communicate something we deem important. However, it tends to have the opposite effect by driving people away. So when what you really want is to connect and be heard, the end result is often the opposite and you can end up destroying your relationships. Any form of aggression is the biggest obstacle to emotionally intelligent communication.

At Private Counselling Ashford Kent we are aware that people often think that anger is a way of getting what they want, however this often creates the opposite result. Research shows that a hostile communication style will drive people away: when you’re aggressive people will react negatively to you. They will feel uncomfortable, they won’t understand what is going on and they’ll want to get away from you.

We all need to take responsibility for how we respond to situations and any feelings they make evoke in you.  When we feel angry, it’s all we can think about but it’s important to take a breath and think things through properly to break the cycle of anger.

Our Private Counsellors Ashford understand that people experience negative emotions such as anger. Sometimes this is often a consequence of being hurt or jealousy? Sometimes, we think we’re frustrated with a person or a situation, but the truth is, we’re actually feeling pain or the threat of rejection. It takes courage and honesty to take responsibility for the real reasons behind your negative frustrations. 

Are you basing your anger on fact or interpretation? More often than not, it’s interpretation. Our Private Counselling Ashford therapists can help you with this. It’s easy to jump to conclusions based on feeling surrounding what we believe something to be rather than what is actually is. There’s a useful saying ‘just because we feel bad doesn’t necessarily mean it is bad’. Take the time to find out if your interpretation of a situation that frustrates you is factually true. Or has someone unwittingly fallen short of your expectations/moral code and you're misplacing blame?  Remember, they are your expectations only and it’s too easy to blame somebody else for how we feel.